I like long posts

Hello everyone, for the thousandth time, I hate my life. Really, just let me rant. these few days my mood has been going up n down like crazy; it's unexpected, it's very drastic changes, it's fucking ridiculous. I'm scaring myself n everyone else but I can't help it... It's because of 1) my lack of sleep, 2) my fucked up paranoia, feelings n everything along that line n 3) stress. about 2), seriously, I'm going crazy over it. I don't want to care, but I fucking do, n I seem to be fighting with myself over it. my god if this continues I'll be in an asylum pretty soon.

I think I need a holiday, god yeah I do it's like the dec holidays (which aren't gona be any different from normal school days) are motivating me to finish up my fuckin assignments. I know it'll suck with assignments to be completed but let's just say we all need to live in denial some time. I think I sound like a mad fool now but seriously this is what's going on. I hate my feelings I sometimes wished I had none from the start. well Im moving on. I think n I hope. can someone save me from my sanity?! I need like starbucks n a day to relax. faster game would be alcohol n a good nights rest. sigh..

Btw friday was gd, went out with nicole n gabriel. gabriel drove us to some place at bukit timah for ice cream, cause we all shi lian. hah oh we had fei fei before that! wasn't really hungry but I ate anw. so after ice cream we headed to some huge park I never knew existed. it's damn cooling there at night but I guess if there was less people there it'd be a better place to be emo about your life. plus the bridge's so high it's so easy to just jump off. nah kidding. nice place thou. ok then.... sat. met up w dawn n celeste for dinner at soup spoon.. first time there. we talked n stuff... went to bugis n then of course parkway for pool. today was fine, I stayed home the whole day doing typo n now subrina's proj.

I think I just lost a friend. ok whatever it's not like it makes a difference to him. no one to call when I skip class n finish sch anymore! hehe maybe I should just stay in school n stick to plans frm now on.